Why is it so hard to really take control of our own time and energy? We know how important this is, right? And yet so many of us struggle with finding (and keeping) the right balance for ourselves. The reality is, we go to school to learn many things, but not how to manage ourselves - our own time and energy. Instead, we have always been told to look to others to do this for us: our parents told us what to do, our teachers told us what to do, and now our bosses tell us what to do. And in an ideal world, our boss would have the time, energy, and interest to really care for our time and energy, but in reality, they barely manage (if that) to look after their own time and energy in a sustainable way.

Ouch! That realization hit me hard! Me, replaceable? But I have all these skills, I am so dedicated and loyal to my work. I do what it takes (and more). Surely I cannot be that easily replaced? But the reality is this: we ALL are replaceable at work. And yes, quite easily. No matter your position, once you leave (for whatever reason – illness, accident, burnout, or worse) you will be replaced in no time. Will you be missed? Sure, maybe, temporarily. But your work will be picked up by the next person, and even though they will not be you, they will manage the work. So the company is happy and has moved on. And you? You may still be licking your wounds – after all this time, replaced, just like that. Your ego is not happy.

It had been a long day at work, and I knew I needed to rush back home to look after the kids. The work day still on my mind, still going through my to-do-list, I arrived home - only to find my kids flying at me, starting to throw their demands at me immediately. Mom, look at this; mom, I want to eat something; mom, today in school… And all I could think was: leave me alone! Can’t you see I’m just coming in from work, and I need a break?

I used to think that my manager was (at least partly) responsible for my wellbeing at work. After all, they knew my goals and what I was working on. However, what I have come to realize is that even when we struggle to keep ourselves afloat at work, our manager will never be able to come and save us.